Sangria and Stilettos

Dealing With The Death of An Ex

Tue, 25 Sep 2012 20:04:06 -0400

Dealing With The Death of An Ex:

Our relationship had been over for a long time, but we did love one another once upon a time and here I was finding out this news after everyone else. Why was I finding out this way? Why hadn’t anyone thought to tell me? Was I not supposed to care, because we’d dated so long ago? Would it have been easier to process this information if we weren’t friends or if we had a bad break-up?

Photo

Thu, 16 Aug 2012 22:29:01 -0400

I heart Jesse Boykins III! theloveapp: Jesse Boykins III x i_D...

Sat, 11 Aug 2012 11:18:40 -0400

I heart Jesse Boykins III!

theloveapp:

Jesse Boykins III x i_D Magazine interview | Read Here : http://i-donline.com/2012/08/i-ntroducing-jesse-boykins-iii/ | Photo by Seth Fluker | Toronto, CA

Are The Olympics Over Yet? Let's Review...

Sat, 11 Aug 2012 10:16:32 -0400

Are The Olympics Over Yet? Let's Review... :

Are the Olympics over yet? It kinda feels like they’ve been going on for a really long time. Is it just me? All I know is, this has got to be the most that I’ve watched NBC since “The Cosby Show” aired.

My “Good, Bad, Ugly” thoughts on London 2012, here.

thomasjamesdesign: ‘Don’t chase your dreams, overtake...

Fri, 10 Aug 2012 19:30:16 -0400

thomasjamesdesign:

‘Don’t chase your dreams, overtake them.’

Illustration and quote I created based on the success of Usain Bolt.

thisisjamaica: BBC Radio 1Xtra Celebrates Jamaica 50

Mon, 06 Aug 2012 12:05:05 -0400

thisisjamaica:

BBC Radio 1Xtra Celebrates Jamaica 50

Growing Up Jamerican

Sun, 05 Aug 2012 21:14:38 -0400

Growing Up Jamerican:

As I sit here on the eve of Jamaica’s 50th Independence (August 6), I have one eye on the live feed of the 100m Men’s Final at the 2012 Olympics and the other on the weatherchannel.com to see if Tropical Storm Ernesto is on track to affect Jamaica, with quick glances at my phone for texts from family and friends attending Jamaica50 celebration events.

I’m a “gen X”, first-generation American or “Jamerican”. My parents immigrated to the U.S. from Jamaica in the early seventies and settled in…Jamaica, Queens — which I’ve always thought was funny.

[Click here to read more.]

Consider the Source

Sun, 05 Aug 2012 12:26:59 -0400

Consider the Source :

Question: When did we start making ignorant Tweets international news?

Think About It: For all of the indignation that some Black writers/bloggers and magazines showed about “Hairgate”, where were their stories about Gabrielle Douglas, John Orozco, Cullen Jones, Kari Miller, Carmelita Jeter, Alyson Felix, Sanya Richards-Ross and others prior to last week? Why didn’t the majority of Black America know about these phenoms before the Olympics? Have they already been celebrated with a cover on or featured in our signature magazines and I missed it?

Consider the source. Just because the words “black”, “ebony”, “afro” might appear in the title, that doesn’t always mean that the best interests of the Black community are at heart. Some of us fell for the old banana-in-the-tailpipe routine and let something minor distract us from the importance / significance of something major.

Read more here. What do you think? Leave a comment.

The Guy Next Door

Thu, 26 Jul 2012 21:35:57 -0400

The Guy Next Door :

If my next boyfriend / husband is someone I already know, I’m kicking his ass for making me wait. Is Jesus going to come again before I have another serious relationship? As Charlotte once lamented on an episode of Sex & the City, “I’ve been dating since I was fifteen. I’m exhausted. Where is he?” What if he’s been here all along?

(Insert a mental remix to Musiq’s 2000 single, “Girl Next Door” as you read. Or just click here and sing-a-long.)

I started to think about the guys that I’ve known throughout the course of my crushing / dating career and wondered if any of them, could be the “one”. Seriously, dude. Make yourself known, post-haste. What are you waiting for? Procrastination is not a turn on!

Is it the guy with a slight resemblance to Al B. Sure that first I met back in the day? We went on several dates, the first of which still is in my Top 3 all time favorites… He didn’t want to date exclusively (read: he was a junior manwhore), I moved to a different state, I got married, he got married, I got divorced, he got divorced, but we’ve kept in touch throughout… could it be him?

Or, what about my not so secret crush that I communicate (flirt) with all the time on Facebook? He never took notice of my existence in the several years that we attended the same church…*sideeye*, but, we have mutual friends and connected via our “like” of each others comments. It took me 18 years to wear him down and now he can finally see how funny, charming and well rounded I am in cyberspace, can’t he? Well, I’m even more entertaining in 3D. Save for the fact that we’re 900 miles apart and he doesn’t like dogs, it could still work? (<—- an example of the kind of thinking that gets me into trouble everytime…)

It could be the actual tall, dark and handsome barista who is the only one who can make my grande caramel macchiato with extra caramel, just right. He’s seen me at my groggy, unmotivated worst on a daily basis for the past 18 months but always has a smile and a kind word and a take on current events at the ready.

Knowing me, the way I do, it could very well be a redux of my last romance. (I think I just heard all my girlfriends say “HELL NO!”, before their heads simultaneously exploded…)

It could literally be the guy that lives next door…but he’s 73. So…, we’ll see. Is it my perpetual “Words With Friends” nemesis? You love words, I love words. A match made in Webster’s dictionary heaven.

If I were still waiting to exhale, I’d have suffocated. I’m not sitting home alone waiting for anyone to sweep me off my feet. But if I already know you, we’re saving each other a lot of time in the awkward getting-to-know-you phase and can move straight to the love and adventure. Let’s get to steppin’!

amandaonwriting: Character Questionnaire How to create a...

Mon, 23 Jul 2012 00:03:48 -0400

amandaonwriting:

Character Questionnaire

How to create a character for your novel.

1. How does your character think of their father? What do they hate and love about him? What influence - literal or imagined - did the father have?

2. Their mother? How do they think of her? What do they hate? Love? What influence - literal or imagined - did the mother have?

3. Brothers, sisters? Who do they like? Why? What do they despise about their siblings?

4. What type of discipline was your character subjected to at home? Strict? Lenient?

5. Were they overprotected as a child? Sheltered?

6. Did they feel rejection or affection as a child?

7. What was the economic status of their family?

8. How does your character feel about religion?

9. What about political beliefs?

10. Is your character street-smart, book-smart, intelligent, intellectual, slow-witted?

11. How do they see themselves: as smart, as intelligent, uneducated?

12. How does their education and intelligence – or lack thereof - reflect in their speech pattern, vocabulary, and pronunciations?

13. Did they like school? Teachers? Schoolmates?

14. Were they involved at school? Sports? Clubs? Debate? Were they unconnected?

15. Did they graduate? High-School? College? Do they have a PHD? A GED?

16. What does your character do for a living? How do they see their profession? What do they like about it? Dislike?

17. Did they travel? Where? Why? When?

18. What did they find abroad, and what did they remember?

19. What were your character’s deepest disillusions? In life? What are they now?

20. What were the most deeply impressive political or social, national or international, events that they experienced?

21. What are your character’s manners like? What is their type of hero? Whom do they hate?

22. Who are their friends? Lovers? ‘Type’ or ‘ideal’ partner?

23. What do they want from a partner? What do they think and feel of sex?

24. What social groups and activities does your character attend? What role do they like to play? What role do they actually play, usually?

25. What are their hobbies and interests?

26. What does your character’s home look like? Personal taste? Clothing? Hair? Appearance?

27. How do they relate to their appearance? How do they wear their clothing? Style? Quality?

28. Who is your character’s mate? How do they relate to him or her? How did they make their choice?

29. What is your character’s weaknesses? Hubris? Pride? Controlling?

30. Are they holding on to something in the past? Can he or she forgive?

31. Does your character have children? How do they feel about their parental role? About the children? How do the children relate?

32. How does your character react to stress situations? Defensively? Aggressively? Evasively?

33. Do they drink? Take drugs? What about their health?

34. Does your character feel self-righteous? Revengeful? Contemptuous?

35. Do they always rationalize errors? How do they accept disasters and failures?

36. Do they like to suffer? Like to see other people suffering?

37. How is your character’s imagination? Daydreaming a lot? Worried most of the time? Living in memories?

38. Are they basically negative when facing new things? Suspicious? Hostile? Scared? Enthusiastic?

39. What do they like to ridicule? What do they find stupid?

40. How is their sense of humor? Do they have one?

41. Is your character aware of who they are? Strengths? Weaknesses? Idiosyncrasies? Capable of self-irony?

42. What does your character want most? What do they need really badly, compulsively? What are they willing to do, to sacrifice, to obtain?

43. Does your character have any secrets? If so, are they holding them back?

44. How badly do they want to obtain their life objectives? How do they pursue them?

45. Is your character pragmatic? Think first? Responsible? All action? A visionary? Passionate? Quixotic?

46. Is your character tall? Short? What about size? Weight? Posture? How do they feel about their physical body?

47. Do they want to project an image of a younger, older, more important person? Does they want to be visible or invisible?

48. How are your character’s gestures? Vigorous? Weak? Controlled? Compulsive? Energetic? Sluggish?

49. What about voice? Pitch? Strength? Tempo and rhythm of speech? Pronunciation? Accent?

50. What are the prevailing facial expressions? Sour? Cheerful? Dominating?

Questionnaire: The Script Lab

Image: Zazzle

amandaonwriting: Bookish pants

Mon, 23 Jul 2012 00:00:52 -0400

amandaonwriting:

Bookish pants

Kids Don't Belong Everywhere

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 17:54:48 -0400

Kids Don't Belong Everywhere:

After hearing reports that a 4 month old and 4 year old child were at the Aurora theater shooting, can we have an honest conversation about where children belong?

Contrary to the popular belief of some parents, children don’t belong in all places at all times.

It is my opinion that midnight movie showings aren’t the best place for babies. I have to double-check, but I don’t think “Ice Age” and “Toy Story” have late showings for a reason — their target audience should be asleep at that hour.

When a friend and I went to see “Ted” a few weeks ago, we noticed that there were several young children in the theater. I understand how some parents might have seen an oversized stuffed bear in the commercials and thought, “kid movie!”, but even if you didn’t do advance research on the film to check on its appropriateness… (yes, I’m judging you), once you sat there and heard the cursing, drug/sex references… wouldn’t you get up and leave instead of subjecting impressionable minds to that? Can’t wait the six months until it’s offered on PPV or shown on HBO? Is it that important? (Yes, I’m still judging you.)

Last winter, I went to South Beach and was out on crowded Ocean Drive late in the midnight hour. I saw several parents pushing strollers right through crowded sidewalks in front of Wet Willies and the other bars that line that street. Seriously? You couldn’t take the time to be on the opposite / less crowded side of the street closer to the beach and away from the raucous bar scene? What are these people thinking?

Some hair salons have signs posted which read, “No children allowed unless they are having a service provided.” Why? Because (some) tired Moms come to the salon, don’t properly supervise their kids, who then run into hot combs, scissors or get exposed to unsafe chemicals as well as some lively and sometimes R-rated conversation among adults. Kids don’t belong everywhere, especially if they’re not going to be properly supervised.

Unfortunately, violence can happen anywhere, including where children are supposed to be (i.e., schools, playgrounds, etc…) but what I’m talking about is not due just to the threat of random mass violence. It’s the overall environment and what is appropriate for certain age levels.

Yes, parents should still be able to “have a life” after they have children but there are certain lifestyle adjustments and planning that they should go thru in the best interest of the child. Kids simply don’t belong in all places. Even amusement parks have signs that indicate “must be this tall to ride” for their safety. That needs to be applied more often.

"“We do know what makes life worth living. The people we lost in Aurora loved and were loved. They..."

Sun, 22 Jul 2012 17:48:00 -0400

“

“We do know what makes life worth living. The people we lost in Aurora loved and were loved. They were mothers and fathers, husbands and wives, sisters, brothers, sons and daughters, friends and neighbors.

They had hopes for the future and they had dreams that were not yet fulfilled … a reminder that life is very fragile. Our time here is limited and it is precious. And what matters at the end of the day is not the small things, not the trivial things that so often consume us in our daily lives.

Ultimately, it’s how we choose to treat one another and how we love one another. It’s what we do on a daily basis to give our lives meaning and give our lives purpose. … What we remember will be those we loved, and what we did for others. That’s why we’re here.”

”

- President Obama

Come And Talk To Me

Wed, 06 Jun 2012 19:17:44 -0400

Come And Talk To Me :

Is it possible to have a meaningful conversation on social media? Or do you respond to disagreements like a cast member of Basketball Wives?

Not all who wander are lost.

Sun, 03 Jun 2012 23:35:45 -0400

Not all who wander are lost.

My arts and crafts for the day. Crayon art!

Sun, 03 Jun 2012 23:32:45 -0400

My arts and crafts for the day. Crayon art!

"Reading is like thinking, like praying, like talking to a friend, like expressing your ideas, like..."

Sat, 02 Jun 2012 21:30:32 -0400

“Reading is like thinking, like praying, like talking to a friend, like expressing your ideas, like listening to other people’s ideas, like listening to music, like looking at the view, like taking a walk on the beach.”

- Roberto Bolano (2666)

Photo

Sat, 02 Jun 2012 21:23:08 -0400

National Gardens, Athens Greece

Mon, 28 May 2012 15:28:46 -0400

National Gardens, Athens Greece

They have Bob’s message in Central Athens…...

Mon, 28 May 2012 15:25:57 -0400

They have Bob’s message in Central Athens… “One Love”.